Your energy is already low, life seems to go by so fast, and it's hard to keep up under normal circumstances. Now, here come the holidays with the extra demands, time commitments and financial burdens. So, it's to be expected that you may not be in the most enthusiastic and cheerful moods as the holidays approach.
Another set-up, if you will, is that about expectations. I remember seeing Christmas decorations first show up in some stores in September! Anytime there is such a long build-up to a celebrated event (like a wedding, the birth of a child, or a major holiday like Christmas), it's easy for expectations to build as the anticipated event looms closer. What's the phrase? "Expectations are pre-meditated resentments." The more we expect, the more likely we are going to be disappointed when reality can't possibly measure up to our fantasied ideal.
Part of the strategy for surviving the holidays is to watch your pace. Don't try to do everything. Simplify. Don't go to every party or send a holiday greeting card to everyone you know. Try to preserve an oasis or two in the middle of the holiday season. This could mean just one day out of every ten that is off limits to scheduling. Use the day to slow things down. Lower the stimulation. Go for a walk. Listen to music. Sit by the fire. Have a slower conversation with a friend or companion that isn't about the un-ending events of the day.
Be willing to scale things down a little when putting on a 'spread.' You don't always have to pull out the fine china (which has to be washed by hand), or use linen table cloths. A side dish or two works just as well as five of them. We tend to eat too much as it is.
I don't know how many times when I ask people to share their favorite memories of childhood, they treasure more the simpler interactions with loved ones. It's about sitting around a campfire, playing a board game with the family, going for a walk or a hike. Rarely do people refer to exotic trips or expensive gifts as their most treasure memories. So, no one's Christmas is going to be ruined if things are simplified a little bit in the gift 'department' as well.
If the holidays are getting the best of you (instead of your family getting the best of you), try talking with one of our mental health professionals at Heritage Professional Associates. Outside of the Chicagoland area, ask someone whom you trust for the name of a reputable mental health professional.
